On the Websphere, Sometime in March/April 2007
Her: Ok, so when i come and visit we can meet in Trieste and get some pizza...
Me: Pizza? Come on, we're in Trieste! It would be a crime not to eat something typical!
Her: Ok, what do you suggest?
Me: I think we should go out for a Kebab.
Her: Cool!
Me: So, what do you think I should do?
Him: I think the solution is that you should stop behaving like an asshole. Also, I think i should take you out to get smashed now.
Me: But you don't drink anymore.
Him: I don't. You're the one who's getting smashed, not me.
Me: Who's paying for the drinks?
Him: You are.
Me: Oh. (Long Pause) Ok.
Florence, December 2006
Her: So are you planning anything for your birthday?
Me: Nothing special, you know i never celebrate. Probably just going out with some friends, having some drinks. What are you doing for yours?
Her: Oh, same as last year. I'm going bungee jumping.
The Blues Busters live with Byron Lee & The Dragonairs at The Sombrero Club, 1962. (via)
The players: My Father, The Webmaster.
The time: two days ago, lunchtime.
Him: We're running off to the lawyer, but i left something to eat in the fridge. Don't know what it is though.
Me: You don't? Who made it?
Him: Oh, I did.
Him: I slept too much, i need to go to drink.
Me: ...
Him: No wait, it was the other way around.
Location: Tetris Carnival Party
Time: yesterday. ish.
Her: What are you dressed up as*? You look just like Johnny Depp in Fear And Loathing!
Me: Thanks! It's the first time anyone's compared me to Johnny Depp, pity you chose the film where he's bald and overweight...
Her: Hey, at least i didn't say Ed Wood.
*PS: I wasn't.
The webmaster would like to beg apology for the protracted lack of updates by presenting You with one of the most beautiful things ever committed to film.
Laurel & Hardy - Dance Scene from "Way Out West", 1937.
"At the Ball, That's All" performed by The Avalon Boys.
I am blogging from a new laptop.
(i love this strip)
For some reason, this very website makes the new laptop's browser crash.
Location: Undisclosed (My current employer might be reading).
Players: Two members of a Distinguished Band from Trieste.
Time: around 11AM of Saturday, 10 February.
Her: Ok, my idea is we drive back to trieste at 300km/h so we can go see Inland Empire.
Him: Come on, we can take our time and catch a showing around eight.
Her: Yeah, but I want to see it twice.
I'm sure you're all very well aware of the upcoming celebration but it's always a good thing to remind you. Imagine the shame of stepping out of your door on wednesday morning and realizing you forgot to wear your gorilla suit. C'mon, pull the good one out from your wardrobe. You know you want to.
And just to give you something else to look at, here's my post from last year's NGSD where a rare translated Don Martin publication was unearthed.
Prologue:
"Jack Ren (********@hotmail.com) has added you to MSN Messenger. Do you want to allow him to contact you and see you online?"
Feeling rather surprisingly friendly, i accepted partially out of curiosity.
The following conversation ensued:
evaristo writes:
Hi! With who do i have the pleasure...?
Jack Ren writes:
hello
Jack Ren writes:
what do you mean? i am sorry, i can't understand!
evaristo writes:
i was asking who are you
Jack Ren writes:
haha. this is Jack from China. and we are welding & cutting machine manufacturer.
evaristo writes:
oh i see, i was wondering why you added me on messenger
Jack Ren writes:
may i ask where are you from?
evaristo writes:
i am living in italy
Jack Ren writes:
ok, and you name is ***** **** ********* ?
evaristo writes:
yes, that is correct. How do you know?
evaristo writes:
hello? How do you know my name?
Jack Ren writes:
very occasionally!
evaristo writes:
i'm sorry i don't understand!
evaristo writes:
why do you know my name?
Jack Ren writes:
i got your info from the internet occasionally. so i add you . and thought you are welding industry, am i right?
evaristo writes:
no, i'm sorry!
evaristo writes:
i am just a student
Jack Ren writes:
oh,i see.
evaristo writes:
i am very sorry
Jack Ren writes:
never mind!
Jack Ren writes:
we can be friends anyway!
End of conversation.
This blog is currently being upgraded. Things may look a bit wonky for a while. The webmaster doesn't exclude the possibility of throwing all this 2.0 rubbish away and just going back to the old version.
1hr later UPDATE: i guess i'll be leaving this new font as the old one for some reason gets the sidebar and post titles all pixelly. Most things are now accounted for.
What's left:
1. removal of links from post titles. If anybody has any clue about how to do this please let me know.
2. reinclusion and updating of "latest cds" sidebar section
3. don't remember. Maybe it had to do with getting the old font back.
2days later update: Ok, this font sort of stays. Title links are still a pain. I'm thinking of just picking another template and getting this over with. All this mess is a testament to the expression "if it ain't broke, don't fix it".
It's The Captain's Birthday! Don Van Vliet is 66 today and that already makes it one of the best days in the year. It is usually a matter of celebration on this website. This year, however, we don't really have anything ready. This is not a problem though, because we here at WGD are rather good at improvising.
Therefore, this whole week will be dedicated to The Good Captain in one way or another. For starters, i think we should remind you of what makes the man so important. So here's a link to a 1991 interview which has recently been made into a short film.
And here is an Mp3 of The Captain performing Orange Claw Hammer, guitar backing courtesy of mr. F.Zappa.
Captain Beefheart and Frank Zappa - Orange Claw Hammer - 160kps 5.3Mb Mp3
Lyrics:
Orange Claw Hammer
Uh thick cloud caught uh piper clubs tail
The match struck blue on uh railroad rail
The old puff horse was just pullin' thru
'n uh man wore uh peg leg forever
I'm on the bum where the hoboes run
The air breaks with filthy chatter
Oh I don't care there's no place there
I don't think it matters
My skin's blazin' thru
'n my clothes in tatters
'n the railroad looked
Like uh "Y" up the hill of ladders
Ohe shoe fell on the gravel
One stick poked down
Gray of age fell down on uh pair of ears
An eagle shined thru my hole watch pocket
Uh gingham girl baby girl
Passed me by in tears
Uh jack rabbit raised his folded ears
Uh beautiful sagebrush jack rabbit
'n an oriole sang like an orange
His breast full uh worms
'n his tail clawed the evenin' like uh hammer
His wings took t' air like uh bomber
'n my rain can caught me uh cup uh water
When I got into town
Odd jobs mam ah yer horse I'll fodder
I'm the round house man
I once was yer father
Uh little up the road uh wooden
Candy stripe barber pole
'n above it read uh sign "Painless Parker"
Lic-licorice twisted around under uh fly
'n uh youngster cocked 'er eye
God before me if I'm not crazy
Is my daughter
Come little one with yer little dimpled fingers
Gimme one 'n I'll buy you uh cherry phosphate
Take you down t' the foamin' brine 'n water
'n show you the wooden tits
On the Goddess with the pole out s'full sail
That tempted away yer peg legged father
I was shanghaied by uh high hat beaver moustache man
'n his pirate friend
I woke up in vomit 'n beer in uh banana bin
'n uh soft lass with brown skin
Bore me seven babies with snappin' black eyes
'n beautiful ebony skin
'n here it is I'm with you my daughter
Thirty years away can make uh seaman's eyes
Uh round house man's eyes flow out water
Salt water
-Don Van Vliet, 1969
Good morning. This is, i suppose, officially the first post of the new year. Funny thing is, i still haven't had the time to write the traditional end-of-2006 post. So traditional that at one point of our new year's dinner somebody asked "have you all written your end-of-year posts?", and everybody answered in the affirmative. That's 2006 to you, all but one of the people i was celebrating with have one or more blogs, or at least an internet presence. The one without, an increasingly rare plus, has my eternal admirement.
Certain things have been somewhat changing in the online world in the meantime. I woke up yesterday to find Blogger, Last.fm and Myspace functioning entirely in italian. In wrong italian. In Babelfish-translated italian. I now have nightmares of living in a world where everybody speaks a profoundly incorrect and rebabelfished version of their own languages, and where writing doesn't fit on street signs because nobody bothered to modify the template.
(Wrong Italian is, i assume, in the same linguistic family as Drunk English)
Luckily, some backstage fiddling and jiggledypokery fixed all that. And as a consequence, we now have tags. And if one of these days i feel crazy or suicidal enough, i might even try to start improving the template using all these beautiful new Blogger tools which quite frankly terrify me to the bone. Meanwhile, tags have been added to most recent posts for your enjoyment. Chances of me going back and tagging the entire archives: Yeah right. Good one.
So, that's all. Enjoy your 2007(which i certainly didn't ask for, 2006 was being particularly good for me already), expect new stuff on this page sometime soonish.
It's never a bad moment to post a Beefheart video.
Captain Beefheart and the Magic Band, Cannes Beach, January 27th 1968.
Things here at WGD Central have been rather hectic lately so as you may see not much of the ol'blogging has been done due to an extended case of the dreadful lots-of-interesting-stuff-to-be-done-away-from-the-internet disease. Usually what you would see here is a year-ending post of reflections, links and whatnot interspersed with my monotonous repetition of how little these festivities matter to me in the first place. It'll probably come, but not yet. Sometime in january. Or february would be cool too.
Thing is, i have loads of stuff to update about (i can't believe i haven't mentioned certain activities of mine here yet), two or three long unfinished posts, neat pictures to share and other online incarnations to make public but i just don't have the time right now. In the meantime i suppose you can make do with the links on the sidebar and the constantly growing del.icio.us sitefeed. And read some webcomics, webcomics will love you back. I'll be back after the break.
What you have just read is a reassuring "don't worry, the blog is not dead nor as a matter of fact am i" post. Happy new whatever you want it to be.
(A Parte: Oh dear, december 2006 seems to have become International Dead Dictators Month. Which brings back to mind tv images of Ceausescu's execution back on christmas day, 1987. I might be getting the year wrong but i'm quite sure about the day. Last time i spent christmas in Glasgow, i think. Anyway, i just wanted to say that the rejoicing done previously for Chile and Turkmenstan's gladly departed former rulers was not extended to Iraq's, at least in this old-fashioned anarchoid* household. As a matter of fact, we're all rather pissed off about what happened. There, i said it.)
*Temporary and debatable definition of the anarchoid household my upbringing stems from: Pre-spanish civil war, Post-Jacovitti.
